In the last 2 weeks, we have had three unexpected car repairs, a threatening hospital bill (which had already been paid!) and I’ve had the headache from the gates of hell. Of course, that list doesn’t even begin to touch the mishaps at work, losing papers I needed and knocking over the dog’s dish of water all over my cute little bedroom slippers with the white bows on top! Somehow, some way, our checkbook survived the repair bills without bouncing all over the state of Virginia, and Advil eventually took my headache down to a dull roar.
This journey of waiting for answers has taught me to look for and to find God’s Hands in everyday, ordinary situations. No, I don’t miraculously see His work in every situation every single time, but I have chosen a mindset to be thankful. I’m not happy we had to spend a HUGE amount of money on our cars last week, but I am grateful for my husband who transferred funds so we wouldn’t have to use a credit card. He did it without any fanfare, no self-credit, he just simply took care of it. I am….thankful.
Our stress level from taking care of Daniel and the keeping up with all the medical paperwork is downright overwhelming at times. This is not a situation I would have chosen, but my faith has endured and my awareness of God’s presence has heightened. I am…thankful.
The housework has often been neglected, or put off to support Daniel with his homework or to just be with him when he’s fully awake and alert. (Yes, I still have one bin of Christmas stuff to put away.) Sometimes he just lays on the foot of our bed and chats with me. I’ll be folding laundry until Jesus calls me home so the clothes piles can just get a little higher when I’m chatting and laughing with my boy! I am…thankful.
Daniel’s illness has not only affected our family, but has rippled to others with their concern, their love and their prayers, I’ve lost count of the many doctors we’ve seen and the places we’ve been….searching, hoping, anticipating answers. For a very long time, we did not say anything to anyone except our immediate family, Daniel did not ( and still does not) want any attention drawn to him. Finally, the borderline extrovert part of me exploded and I begged for prayer because I just couldn’t go it alone anymore. Now, I don’t have to cover up tears when I’m having a crummy day and I don’t have to hide behind a fake smile. I just simply ask others to pray and I am….thankful.
My thankfulness is not a sickening Pollyanna type, it is genuine, true, simple and just there despite our circumstances, God reminds us to be thankful in all circumstances, that doesn’t mean we have to falsely be thankful FOR everything. It simply means we are to rest in His Hands and be thankful while we’re in the journey along the way to be with Him.
I am….THANKFUL. I Thessalonians 4:18