Marriage in the Real World

      25 years ago this weekend, I married my sweet man and inherited his two young children.  I thought I was going into it with my eyes wide open and my heart wrapped around him, but life has a way of intervening and being, well, real.  The Brady Bunch we were not, instead it was an emotional, and life-changing learning curve for me.  Single, never married, no children and enough baggage from my past to circle the world twice; I became his wife and another mom to our children.   Twenty-five years later we are still standing hand-in-hand, a little older, a whole lot wiser, and very proud to call each other husband and wife. 

     How I love this precious man!  He tells me I’m beautiful when I look like crap, he loves when I’m in shape and when I’m not. This sweet man never, ever criticizes, uses sarcasm or even raises his voice.  He’s loved me through every hormonal moment and mood swing.  My precious man knows exactly when I NEED ice cream and when I just need to be left alone.  Our love languages are on the different ends of the spectrum, he responds to touch and I deeply appreciate any act of service no matter how small.

     It’s not a fairy tale, it’s work between two believers who want to be a legacy for their children and grandchildren.   Don’t think for one moment that we never disagree, we do.  It’s not pleasant, but it’s also handled with kindness and assurance of love for one another.  Our marriage is also dealing with all that life throws at us.  He’s the methodical, logical one, I’m the one who’s up all night praying, crying, and being emotional for the two of us. I’m also the one who laughs at all the stupid stuff that happens on a daily basis.  I’ve learned to be calmer in his approach to life and He’s learned to lighten up being around me all the time. 

     We’ve lived through and gotten to the other side of relentless life issues: the death of our parents, a job loss, a difficult pregnancy,  constant financial strains, and ongoing health issues.  We’ve lived through, “it’s your turn to change the poopy diaper”, “you get the first nap and then I’ll take one”, 1000 rewinds of Veggie Tales, homework tears, and ballet classes.  As the children got older, life and its realness never let up for a moment.  Still, we stand, we pray, we never give up…no, it’s not easy, but life is not promised to be easy.  We are promised that God will never leave us, nor forsake us and we have clung to His promise too many times to count.

       Happy Anniversary to the man I married twenty five years ago.  You are my love, my best friend, my hero and the one I’ll stand next to always both now and in eternity. This redhead loves you forever and always!

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